30 Day Song Challenge - Day 4

Day 4 - A song that makes you sad.

It's crazy to think that you can listen to a song thousands of times through your childhood, but then as soon as you link that song to something sad, it tarnishes the song forever and you never think of it the same.

Well thats this song in the nutshell.

2011 was the worst year of my life.

I set myself a challenge to take a photo every single day to document that year.  When I first started, all I could think was that nothing ever happens to me and that I'm going to look back on these photos and think LAME!  However, when I look back on them now, I'm on a rollercoaster of emotions.  From denial, hope to pure devastation.

You see 2011 was the year my Mum was diagnosed and a few short months later passed away with cancer.

Throughout her whole treatment, I never once thought "What are you going to do if she doesn't make it through this?"

If anything, knowing how stubborn my Mum was, and how much she loved her children (and looking after me), not living wasn't an option.  If only she had a choice.

Things were starting to look up and she was starting to get better.  However, they then went downhill fast.

I remember so clearly being the hospital and a nurse asking me if I had "made arrangements."  I couldn't stop crying and when my Mum woke up and asked me what was wrong, I told her I had a headache and she made me go home.

The whole way home all I was angry.  How dare this nurse think that my Mum wasn't going to pull through this.

The next day I was at work and I got a phone call from my brother telling me I needed to come home now.  1:13am the next morning, I received a phone call from my brother telling me that my Mum and my best friend had passed away.  We had all gone to see her a couple of hours before.  She could barely speak, but she did manage to choke out an "I love you" to us kids.

My Mum was a very fiercely proud of where she was from.

Born in Glasgow, Scotland, she and her family immigrated to Australia when she was young, but she never forgot where she was from.

She always used to try and make us kids have bagpipes to celebrate every occasion.  (Which we never did - Sorry Mum.)  But she tell me all the time that when she died, she wanted bagpipes playing this song.

So that's exactly what we did.

We called everywhere to find a piper, and after a a couple of days searching, we finally found a man who was happy to play for us.

Until the end of time, this will remain the most powerful song to me, and will never not take me back to that day.  To that year.  To those memories.

This ones for you Mummas!




Aussie Out
xo